Kapil Sharma Special Jokes


Kapil Ko Vodafone Mein Operator Ki Job Mil Gayi.
.
Magar Pehle Din hi bahut maar
padi aur
nikaal diya gya…
.
BeCause
.
First Caller : Mera Vodafone Ka Sim
Kharab
Ho Gaya Hai..!!
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Kapil To Pagal Airtel Ka Le Le…..

 


Kapil Sharma vs. Auto rickshaw driver:

Kapil: kitna paisa hua?

Auto wala: 30 Rs..

Kapil: Ye le 15 Rs

Auto Wala: Ye kya sirf 15 Rs.. ye to cheating hai

Kapil: Cheating kaise..Tu bhi to baith k aaya hai.. to sharing ka paisa kon dega, Tera baap? 😀

 


 

Shamaa bani to parwaane bane

Jaam bana to maikhaane bane

Kuchh to khaas baat hai bittu sharma teri family mein…

Warna, yun hi nahin shehar mein Pagalkhaane bane

 

 


Kapil Sharma –
“aur koi bhaai bandhu jo,
koi sawaal puchna chahta hai” ?
.
.
.
.
.
.
actually means – “aur koi bhaai
bandhu jo apni bezzati karwaana
chahta hai”… ?

Agree Na ???

 

 

 


Boy- Hey

.
.
.
Girl- Today I wanna tell you those 3
magical
words..
.
.
.
.
.
Boy- Oh, Wow, tell me fast..
I have been waiting for them!
.
.
.
.
.
.
Girl- Babaji Ka Thullu


Pappu juice wale se :-
.
Jaldi se juice de ladai hone wali
hai….
.
ek glass pine ke baad..
ek glass aur de ladai hone wali
hai..
.
.
woh bhi pene ke baad……
ek glass aur de jaldi ladai hone
wali hai..
.
juice wala :- kab hogi ladai?
.
.
Pappu :- Jab tu paise mangegaa !!


Girl: aaj meri dil ka operation hai.
boy: Pata hai…
girl : I love u
boy : me bhi bahut pyar karta hu
tumse
.
.
operation k baad jab ladki ko hosh
aaya to sirf uska baap kadha tha…
.
.
girl: wo kaha hai
father: tumhe nahi pta tumhe dil
kisne diya…???
.
girl: what..??
.
.
or zor zor se rone lagi….
.
.
father: majak kar raha hu….
kamina bahar samose kha raha hai


There are 4 Chambers in Heart :

1 for God
1 for Mom-Dad
1 for Brother’s-Sister’s &
1 for Love…
What about Friends?
.
.
.
SORRY. No place for Frnds in Heart
.
.
.
Bcoz Tum log to Heart Beat
ho Yaar, Jis k bagair Dil he bekaar hai

1 Like Frnds Ke Naaam


Student’s Law Of Tension..
.
.
.
.
.
.
Pressure Is Inversely Proportional
To The
Number Of Days,
Left For the Exams,
.
.
.
Where ‘KAL SE PADHENGE’
Remains
Constant.!


Ek Ladki Cosmetic Ki Dukan Par Gayi
Aur Dukandaar Se Boli.
Ladki: “Bhaiya, Koi Achha Sa
Shampoo Dena”
Dukandaar Use Ek Shampoo Ki Bottle
Deta Hai.
Ladki: “Bhaiya, Is Ke Saath Jo Free
Gift Hai Woh To Do”
Dukandaar Hairani Se Bola: “Par Aisa
Koi Gift Nahi Hai ”
Ladki: “Magar Bottle Pe To Likha Hai
Dandruff Free“
.
.
.
.
larki rockkk dukandar shockkkkk


Ek aadmi samundar me
nahatay huye doobne laga to us
ne pooja ki
“Hey Bhagvan !
Agar mai bach
gaya to
Biryani ki deg garibo ko
khilaunga”
Ek badi si lehar ne usko sahil pe
phenk dia,
Usne upar dekha aur kaha,
“hehe, Kaunsi Biryani, kaisi
biryani…
.
.
Achanak 1 aur lehar usay
wapis ley gayi
to aadmi kehne laga
“mera matlab tha Chicken
ya Mutton ..?”


Grlfrnd:” Plz Don’t Drink & Drive,
Accident Bahot Ho Rahe Aaj kal..!!
.
.
.
Boy:” Thanks Baby, You’re So
Caring..!!
.
.
.
Friend:” Plz Don’t Drink & Drive,
Accidents Bahot Ho Rahe ajkal..!!
.
.
.
Boy:” Chal Be Saale Apne Baap Ko
Mat Sikhaa.


Real Fact. . .
Bhookh Ki Halat Ho Or 1Roti K 4 Tukde
Ho. .
.
.
Khane Wale 5 Ho….
Tab Bhi Ek Insan Hai
Jo Kehta Hai Ki Mujhe Bhookh Nahi
Hai. . . . . .
.
.
.
.
WO HAI *MAA*
EK LIKE*** toh banta hai MAA ke liye



Cute proposal
.
.
Girl:please close ur eyes 4 a
movment.
.
.
Boy: Ok
.
.
Girl:Andhera dikh raha hai na
.
.
Boy:yes
.
.
.
Girl: That Is My Life Without You.

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